Last night while I was asleep my mother hacked into my emails. I wouldn't be surprised if my Deviant Art is next. I wouldn't put it past her, she has no awareness of personal space and respect. She woke me last night, sat on the end of my bed and started a cryptic lecture. I got fed up and asked her what the hell she was talking about which lead to her admitting she had read my emails and other stuff. My immediate reaction was to tell her to get out. Get out of my room now. I said it several times which she ignored and kept rambling. I don't know what she said, I rolled over and begged sleep to consume me again. It didn't. Eventually my mother left. She went to bed, and I spent the whole night rocking myself. The little sleep I got wasn't very good and despite the 2 cups of tea I had this morning I feel like a walking Zombie. I have three assignments to do, Awards Night at school tonight which means I won't be able to work on any of them, oh and did I mention I'm waging a war with my mother?

Not surprisingly it's the ones we're supposed to love the most that inspire the purest of hatred.

All in all, don't send me any notes or comments because it's likely she will read them. It's more your privacy I'm wanting to save now. I'm sick and tired of being a doormat, she's done this before and I won't stand for it. I deserve and have a right to have my privacy. Whether or not what I'm doing is 'acceptable' in her books, it's not wrong, nor is it against the law. I'm not ashamed or embarrassed, no I'm angry. I'm furious. This, as most things have been, just isn't fair. I am not a child, I will not meet her on equal ground. She has taken that away herself. I will not talk with her politely, nor will I pretend everything is okay. I will not talk about it with her, there is nothing to talk about. If I had anywhere to go I'd leave.

Sadly, I was locked in last night. My darling mother locked the doors assuming I'd bolt and hid the keys. Isn't she nice? So trusting. Some mother. Locking me in my own house. Like I've got anywhere to go where she wouldn't hunt me down and drag me back.

My friends have taken to calling me "smiley" when ever I'm in this mood. Several people have been asking why I've been silent and a teacher came up and said "Have you even moved?" when I was waiting for Gloria to arrive. Common sense seems to be slowing dying out.

So for now, until I can come back on. Good bye.
-DDH out